That bitch needs a blotting paper.

For crying out loud, bitch. Do you really think that folks calling out racism is bullying? Seriously? Can you even stand yourself right now? Jesus Fucking Christ, woman, you’ve got some nerve. To sit there with your smug attitude, and your greasy ass face, and say that the issues that the BIPOC community has had to deal with for EVER, are “one sided beliefs”…WHOOOOO girl that took some balls. Some big fat greasy ass racist balls. Listen up, buttercup. A “belief” and a “fact” are 2 different things. Perhaps a dictionary is in order. No one can prove a belief, but we can prove facts. It is a FACT, that POC’s have been shit on a whole awful lot for nearly freaking ever, and not just in the knitting community. You can hang out under your oily little knitting rock all you like, but it doesn’t make the facts go away, and the fact is, YOU are a racist twat. I just saw that PomPom has disassociated with you, and spoken out against your shit. Yay! I have a feeling others little by little will take that hint and do the same. Referring to this conversation that is happening as “a certain social justice issue that has infiltrated Instagram” makes you sound like a real piece of work. And then..and THEN, you referred to BIPOCs who are speaking out against racism as “preaching”. Yeap You nailed it. Them colored folks just getting all uppity and preachy, onnacounnta they want them there some basic civil fukin rights. You Dumb bitch. And, those few folks who are standing up for you…all white. All white all the time. Not a shade under blanched almond. Aside from, of course, the POC Neo Nazi sympathizer that you’re friends with. Su.Krita said it right when she brought up that we had POC Nazi sympathizers in the 30s and we still have them now. It’s really beyond unacceptable. As a fellow white girl, I can assure you that you do NOT speak for all of us. You don’t even speak for most of us. You speak for your tiny, sequestered little greased up alt right corner of the interwebs. Which just happens to overlap with the crafting community. You’re not welcome here. Go back to your rock. And for fucks sake, invest in a blotting paper.

I know Kung Fu

Alright, my personal Kung Fu knowledge is fairly limited. But I just had that same feeling that Neo from the Matrix had when he realized he had just downloaded, and fully understood Kung Fu, even though he had never even done it.

I’m sitting here, knitting on the Nutbrown Hare hat, when I realize that I miss crossed a 6 stitch cable, 9 rounds back. This is a fully cabled hat, and I didn’t want to rip out 9 rounds of all over cables. So, I told myself that if I couldn’t figure out how to ladder down and fix it, I was gonna just start over. I didn’t want to do that. So…I saw that the cable in question was completely isolated in my mistake. I didn’t have to worry about any of the stitches on either side. Ok, so I take those 6 stitches off the needles, and I start to gradually ladder down. One string of unknitted yarn at a time…when it fully dawns on me. I have suddenly, and without any kind of previous training, become aware of the fact that I completely understand cable and lace knitting surgery. Seeing the way the yarn behaves when you take a chunk of it and ladder down several rows, I just “knew” what was supposed to happen. It clicked. So, I did what I thought would work, and of course it did. I knew it would. I just don’t know how I knew. I think the Universe just gave me something precious. I am grateful, and so excited to knit up some swatches to play on.

Are you always connected?

I can’t help but sink into the overwhelming feeling that I don’t fit in anywhere, anymore. Everyone I know, outside of my life partner, is constantly connected to the digital universe. I’ve tried it, I really have, but it isn’t healthy for me. I don’t think it’s healthy for most of us. Anyway, I’ve been feeling really lonely lately, and I keep coming back to this thought. No one spends time with each other anymore, everyone seems to be so focused on what’s happening on their phone, that they miss out on the person sitting right next to them. I see people using the digital universe to connect to others who share interests…I’m even trying that, but does it really work? Does making these videos, and sharing them matter at all? I mean, I watch videos. I watch crafty, beautiful blogs…I love them. But, I wish I knew these people in real life. I wish I had a real community, a community of local people who hung out and made things together. We have a small, local group of knitters, but aside from Helen, whom I’ve known since Stitch & Bitch Days, they aren’t really super welcoming or engaging. I feel like an outsider. I’ve felt this way for about 10 years.

Do real friends exist anymore?

Ugh. I have a thousand and one acquaintances, I just wish I had a couple good friends.

Mental Health Issues. You too, huh?

Seems like everyone and their dog, talk about mental health issues these days. Maybe we all have them…

I never even heard about panic attacks and anxiety attacks until I had my first…and then everyone had them. I don’t get it. Maybe everyone has always had them, but we called them by other names?

I don’t know. My whole point was to share that I’ve been dealing with anxiety attacks and apathy something fierce. It makes it really hard to get excited about things, and it saps my creativity.

I’m hoping to come around again soon…it’s just been awfully blah in my head lately.


Life stuff and the #knitlifesurvey thing

My mind has been all over the place recently…I’ve just flown for the first time in my life, fully medicated of course(Full blown phobia, hence no previous flying), Attended a trade show at the largest convention center on the west coast, 84 thousand people in attendance…elbow to elbow, vendors hawking their stuff. So many samples, so much walking, and jostling, and touching people. So tired.

I got a call from my mama while I was down there…she had 2 heart attacks. Mom is the best friend I ever had, so of course I’m freaked out and completely unable to do a god damned thing about it. I’m home now, and I know shes home and doing well, but I still haven’t had a chance to touch base and argh.

Oh, also, I was completely sick while at Expo. Full on upper respiratory bullshit. And SO tired. No one told me about the fact that you shouldn’t fly with upper resp stuff, because it really really REALLY hurts the ears. I still can’t quite hear out of my righty.

Now that I’m home, I’m well and everything, but catching up on work has been kind of a nightmare, and then one of my co workers told me that another coworker for whatever reason has it in for me, and keeps bringing up flaws they find in the management meetings. Of course, no one has said anything, because I haven’t done anything wrong, but the fact that they are using that time to vent specifically about MY department hurts my feelings…I had thought we were friends. Apparently not.

It’s just been a whole 2 weeks of crazy intense energy, and I’m kind of over it, folks. I’d like to catch a break now, thanks verymuchmmmkay?

So, while I sit here trying to unwind a little, I thought I’d do this Knitlifesurvey that’s making the rounds. No one specifically tagged me, but I’ve seen it in all the usual places, so here we go.

The Questions:
What sparked your interest in knitting?

Well, my grandma was an avid crocheter, quilter, and all around crafty broad. I recall being about 6 and wanting to learn crochet, so she taught me. I made endless lengths of chains for a long time. My young child self was perfectly content doing that. I finally figured out how to make little squares, but I lost interest when I discovered music, and the fibery crafter in me fell asleep until I was pregnant with my 2nd child.
How and when did you learn to knit?

I taught myself how to knit, using one of those cheap-o pamphlets you can find in any big box craft store. I was wanting to make a blanket for my baby, who wasn’t born yet.  It was in 2003.
What is your favorite cast on method?

Long tail. It’s the only one I use, unless the pattern specifies another one. That being said, I totally understand that other cast on methods have their place.
What is your favorite type of knitting design element? (Brioché, lace? Cables? Colorwork?… etc.)

Lace. I absolutely adore lace. Colorwork and Cables are right up there though.
What is your favorite project you have ever knit?

It’s my very first attempt at lace, The Vernal Equinox Shawl by Lankakomero.

I started it the year that I was chosen as May Queen for our Pagan group. I wanted to make something lovely for my Crone Witch, and with her being a professional quilt artist, I knew she would appreciate a hand knit item. She also looks blissfully beautiful in a shawl. That project was my first ever attempt at lace, as I mentioned, and it took just over a year to complete. It was all in all a lesson in patience. I slowly, carefully made my way to about 3/4 of the way done, when I noticed a glaring mistake that would not be able to be blocked out…I had to rip back to the first section. It hurt so bad, but I did it, and discovered lifelines in the process, which made the whole thing less daunting. And, when I presented it, I was right…My Witch absolutely adored it.
How many projects are in your Ravelry queue?

as of this moment, 168. To be fair, I put everything I would potentially like to knit in there. I don’t take it terribly seriously.
What is your favorite weight of yarn to work with?

Bulky yarns on larger needles tend to make my hands cramp. I really adore knitting with Fingering weight yarn.
What was your first knitting project?

It started out as a blanket for my 2nd kiddo. I ended up making a hood to attach and it became a cozy hooded blankie for cuddling up in. I used the most god awful baby blue boucle acrylic, because at the time, I didn’t know about wool.
What is the longest time you have had a half-finished project in hibernation? What is it and when did you cast on? Do you still want to finish it?

I have currently a project that is 5 years out, in Hibernation, and yes, I totally wanna finish it. It’s just squeaky (but beautiful) acrylic, so I do a wedge and then put it away for awhile. I just pulled it out again, and it really shouldn’t take too much longer to finish. It’s the Wingspan Shawl, by maylin Tri’Coterie Designs
What is the largest project you have ever knit?

I just finished enough blanket squares for the Magical Throw by Erssie Knits

which, once sewn together will be the largest project size-wise.
What is the worst and just overall bad, didn’t work out thing you ever knit? (Explain what went wrong, lol)

So far, I haven’t had anything end up so bad that it wasn’t fixable. I’m fairly methodical in my knitting, and as soon as I see shit going sideways, I fix it, or frog it.
What is your favorite kind of project to make (socks, sweaters, shawls… etc)?

So far, Shawls. Shawls, and funny stuffed things, or creepy novelty things like the Lab Rat by Emily Stoneking
What is your favorite type of fiber to work with?

That depends on the project. I love knitting with silky soft fibers, but if I was using them for colorwork, it would be a nightmare. My favorite type of yarn to work with is the correct fiber for the given project. And I DO love a good MCN.
Are you a self proclaimed yarn snob?

I don’t know, I don’t think so. I think more often than not, yarn snobs don’t really have a clue what they are talking about. it’s all about superwash merino blah blah blah…No, I am more than happy to use what some yarb snobs would call scratchy wool, when it’s necessary. I do prefer high quality wools, and I do not use acrylic (save for that one last project that I started before I knew about wool) I never judge others for what they use…
What is your dream knitting retreat or fiber festival to attend?

Retreats are something I only just heard about, and they seem to be exorbitantly expensive. I’d rather spend that money on nice yarn, and retreat to my room. LOL It would be fun to go to Edinburgh or the NY Sheep and Wool Festival though.
What is the oldest yarn in your stash?

I might have something as old as 5 years in there. I tend to not keep things around for too long before finding a project for them though.
Are you a gifty knitter or a selfish knitter?

Yes. I love to knit for knitworthy beings, and I love to knit for me.
What do you like to watch or listen to while you knit? (Listen to books, music, tv, movies, vlogs, podcast) list your favorites if you want.

I love watching youtube podcasts, specifically ones that run close to the hour long mark or longer, while I knit. Just a few of my favorites are:

Squirrel Pie Productions


These next folks speak mostly Icelandic, and their podcast is very beautiful Kammebornia

This gal, Randi is a super adorable and prolific crochet artist, and also a very real, very down to earth mama, and that is super appealing to me. Her life happens right there on camera, and it’s very refreshing. Random Randi’s Ramblings

Of course, there are the Grocery girls, Knitting Expat, Voolenvine, and all of the other already super well known podcasts…

Outside of fiber arts podcasts, I enjoy Lada Duncheva, Astrologer Because I think her astrology classes and readings are spot on.
Do you prefer wood or metal needles?

Generally, I prefer wood. I like the warmth and earthy feel, and I don’t see any difference in my knitting speed from one to the other, aside from the fact that my yarn doesn’t slip off the needles when I use wood.
Is there a pattern or project that you have knit more than one time ?

Yes, mainly toys, stuffies, ornaments and things like that. I tend to do hats or shawls only once, because there are SO many that I want to get to.

Just for fun:
Do you have any other hobbies?

I do! I enjoy camping, attending artsy fun festivals, and pirate events, I’m a belly dancer, and I love to read.
What is your favorite snack?

I’m a salty crunchy type. I absolutely adore the Simple Mills Nut Crackers. They are the MOST delicious snack cracker in the known universe. Fact.
What is your favorite color?

I have SO many. I really love black, jet black, dark black, medium black, grey, charcoal, coal black, ebony, sable, Pitch black, silver, gunmetal, Slate, and Pewter.
Do you have pets? If so tell us about them.

Yes of course. At the moment, I have 1 cat. Her name is Lucyfur, and she goes my prah mrauw, or Lucy for short. She is a very tiny cat, delicate bone structure and small round head. She is the color of a russian blue, but with a darker blue classic tabby swirl. She’s gorgeous. Her eyes are the palest silver grey I’ve ever seen, and they just glow. She has a crook in the tip of her tail, that she’s had since we brought her home at 11 weeks of age or so. She is a very twitchy kitty, and her tail constantly twitches as if shes terrified, or about to spray…but she isn’t, and she never does. she’s just a skitty kitty.
Last but not least…. coffee or tea? We have to do that one for good measure, lol!

I like both, but coffee does tend to aggravate my anxiety. I love tea. Love love love.
Now tell who you want to tag (tag 5 vloggers or podcasters with knitting themed shows & Please mention who tagged you).

Nope. Everyone I can think of has already done it. No one tagged me…I just wanted to have some fun.


Instagram follows…

I’ve recently unfollowed a bunch of IG accounts, even though they are knitting or craft related. I had noticed that some accounts are just images of knitted items, and not people who are actually creating garments, or patterns, or yarn…

I’m not into following those kinds of accounts, they just don’t feel real to me. I don’t have room in my day, to occupy myself with regram’d content, and especially when the poster doesn’t even bother to offer where the original content came from.

Unless it’s for a contest, my content is not regram’d from other sources. For me, IG is a place to be real and post original makes. It’s not an image board it’s not pinterest or tumblr. It’s supposed to be for real makers, and so if you have an account for regraming, or showing off other peoples things without even bothering to tell us who they are…I just won’t be following you.

Mars, Pluto, and all the Planets.

My sweetie and I are  taking part of an in depth astrology study with our Crone Witch this year. We are very excited. There are 12 of us taking part, and each of us has been assigned a planet to study in depth.  My planet is Mars. Sweeties planet is Pluto. How funny! I thought for sure I’d get Saturn, being a Capricorn and all, but getting Mars threw me for an interesting loop. Pluto is the higher octave of Mars, which I find amusing and appropriate, considering our relationship.

So, my Mars is in my 11th house. This is a tough study for me, as it brings up some tough shit from the younger days. I don’t yet know how much about that I’ll share here.

And even that sentiment rolls right back around to mars being in my 11th.